#whyistayed #whyileft-Found on another blog-My Melancholia
#whyistayed #whyileft. This author says the reason for staying with an abuser so well, I am borrowing it here.
I added a bit to the title and hope she will not mind. I give her all the credit. Please stop & visit her blog. It is very honest and heartfelt.
I am sharing this for several reasons:
- It is good to know you are not alone in such circumstances whether still there or having left.
- It may be the incentive and encouragement you need either way to get out or keep on. ( I know I have wanted to give in and even give up after I finally did get out.)
- I want to enlighten some folks that ” just have never been there and flippantly say -hurt-fully -even in meaning well-“Why didn’t she just leave?” This lead me to :
- This is about the 8th time I have left. It is the 2nd time I finally was able to get more than just a room at a shelter. I am finally ready to really “make it work” this time. It is so hard to get help. It took me 10 months to get a small apartment. I was at a shelter and was told to leave for 6 months;I had to live for 3 more months with the abuser and I am so thankful the place opened up since I almost wanted to just live in my car when I tried to call and get back into the shelter and they would not let me. This was not because of anything wrong I had done, but because I was too costly with my meds. I could not work because I was trying to get disability and my meds were $200 a month. I tried to get Medicaid, but Missouri is a bad place to do that and they messed with me. I am now waiting on them where I am for it again.
- I also am sharing this because I wish to let you a bit more in on my life. I struggle with mental stuff. I am a very strong person, but depression from bipolar is a fight I have about 60% of days. I can also have extreme anxiety and just a little wrong thing happening on days I have either can make me want to roll up and hide in a cocoon for hours. I am strong because I really never do this. do not be down o yourself if you do do that. (We all have different temperaments and strengths.)
- I said #5 above to lead into # 6 : I really believe that if I had been married to a real gentlemen with a give and take relationship. More as a team and having mercy, grace and love for each others nuances and interests with working together, my mental stuff would have been very minor compared to how it developed with a furious and angry man I lived under.
Now, you may not know what I am really talking about if you do not read her post also. http://chasingdestino.com/2014/09/10/whyistayed-whyileft/ So here is the link again.